Recovery 365 – July 13 - Family Trust

Recovery 365 – Family Trust

Yesterday I wrote about making decisions as the Head of the Family. Today I am thinking about regaining, or even gaining trust from the family. Sure can’t expect your family to accept your decisions if they don’t trust you, now, can ya?  I’ve been clean and sober for over eleven years now, and finally see the doubts disappearing in my family’s eyes and actions. For almost 7 years after my last drink, every time I opened up a can of coca cola, my wife would run into the room where I was, or sometimes just cringe, thinking of all the beer cans I opened up thru the years. I switched to Gator Ade. Today I only drink coffee and water. There are still a couple of things I do that raises eyebrows every now and then.
Whenever I see those tell-tale signs of doubt and mistrust, I try to do something about it, so that it doesn’t reoccur. We’ve all heard the saying: the only thing I need to change is everything? Well, we may be clean and sober, but, we still have the same personality that makes us unique human beings. So I reckon, our personalities must change in order for those that we love, to trust us again. For me, my changes have to be in my expressions, the tone of my voice and my body language. I have to learn how to listen. What? Take the cotton out of my ears and put it in my mouth? Do you really mean that other people have something to say, besides ME?
Gaining trust from you family and friends takes time. Time and patience. We didn’t just drink or drug for a few days or weeks. Speaking for myself, I did it for a lifetime. A lifetime of spreading mistrust and a lot of agony about me. Chaos and turmoil. It’s gonna take time to get that trust back. It’s working; it’s working, as things are getting better and better each day.
One day at a time.
Milkman Mike